Moving overseas and selling everything: the best of best responses I received on Facebook Marketplace

It’s now official. We are moving overseas…again! In a few weeks we are taking off to lead a nomad life for a multi-month trip through Indonesia, Malaysia, Sri Lanka, etc. … Packing for an overseas move means sorting out what is truly essential in our lives. This daunting process is so liberating – I hate it, yet love it – plus selling most of our stuff via Facebook Marketplace and Gumtree has been a pure comedy so far.

Here’s an overview of the best comments I received…

About a very average guitar that we are selling for pretty cheap: 

Buyer: Would you mind sending me a recording of a song so I can hear how the guitar sounds like?

Me: Sorry mate the baby is sleeping…

About a clothes iron I am selling for $5 :

Buyer: I would like to offer $4.

Me: Seriously mate?!

About that very same clothes iron $5:

Buyer: Hello I am living in “somewhere” and I want to buy this item for $5.

Me after I googled her neighbourhood and realised it’s more than 50 km away (with basically all of greater Sydney between us): Mate, that’s pretty far! It’s probably not worth coming from this far to buy a $5 iron…

Buyer: Fine I am coming by train. What train should I take?

Me: There is no train. It’s like 50km from your place and it will take you 3 hours to get there… Buyer: Can you please tell me the train I am ready to come by this afternoon.

Me: There is NO TRAIN you would have to take a ferry and a bus.

Buyer: Jeez why didn’t you tell me that before – it’s too far! (needless to say, our neighbourhood was clearly listed on the ad!)

About a pretty ordinary melamine bookshelf I am letting go for $10:

Buyer: I would like to buy it for $25. I would offer you $50 but you don’t deliver.

Me: Believe me mate you don’t want to buy this for $25…

About a bread maker:

Buyer: Hi what kind of bread can you make with this?

Me: Bread loaf…

Buyer: Can you make some bread and take a picture for me please?

Me: Yes of course and I can also eat it and write you a delightful review.

Yep, moving is so exciting!


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